Maybe I'm Not Just the Girl Next Door

I had a funny memory this morning (which probably doesn't go too far into the past as I find I still do this a lot) when Caleb, Johnny and I were singing a song from one of their kid's worship CDs. Remember thinking you knew the lyrics to a song but you were just way off, and didn't realize until someone overheard you singing and made fun of you for your interpretation? So, on this CD there is a song about God having created the world, and about what He did on each day (the theology of that is a discussion for another day). The song says, "On day two, God knew just what to do..." As we were singing this Caleb busts out with, "On day two, the Noof is fun to do..." I thought that was pretty funny, and even funnier was Caleb's insistence that these words were right, and even funnier thinking about how many times I've defended my lyric interpretations. He's getting so old!

Recently, Caleb informed us that he had changed his goals for his future. For as long as I can remember, he has wanted to be a Monkey Farmer (where he got that from, I may never know), but he now wants to be a Garbage Truck Man. He's been fascinated watching the garbage trucks come by, with a guy hanging off the back - I admit, that does look fun, and I guess the money is good. Okay, Caleb, it's your life! I will admit, though, that I am a bit disappointed, as I was planning to live vicariously through Caleb in his monkey farming. When I was kid one of my dreams in life (this is sad, I know) was to hold a baby monkey wearing a diaper, and feed it a bottle. I was looking forward to Caleb's dream, but now I will get excited for him about riding the back of a truck for the rest of his life.

About two weeks ago, our friend Jameer came over to hang out (as he does just about every afternoon after school). Jameer is 6, and he lives in the apartment complex right next to our house, right at the dead end. I asked him when his birthday is, and he didn't know, but what he did know was that his mom drives a black Cadillac, and that it has rims. Ah, the things we find important to teach our kids. We've had Jameer over for dinner before, and that boy has eaten like he hadn't eaten all day. We don't know if our skinny friend really hadn't eaten all day, or if he just enjoys scarfing down loads of food like an animal. I asked him recently why we never see his mom and dad, and that we'd love to meet them sometime. He told his mom said that she would NEVER come on this street.

Clifton Dr. is three streets away from being in Youngstown. We have a great amount of diversity on our street, which was one of our favorite things about living here. It's awesome to see the mixed race families, the black teens hanging our with the white teens, and our kids playing with their black friends and their white friends. Our end of the street seems to be tough, though, and I don't know what to do about it. Our white neighbors to the right are a great family who we spend a good amount of time with. Our kids are good friends and play together just about every day. To the left of us is the apartment complex which houses a lot of black families, and it honestly seems like they do everything they can to NOT say hi to us. (This sounds like a general statement, but it literally is everyone who drives by.) I feel like I've tried everything. When our neighbors drive either in or out of the complex, and I'm outside, I try different things. I look at the car, waiting for someone to look over so I can give a friendly smile or wave. I look only out of the corner of my eye sometimes, so they don't think I'm just staring at them. I wave - even when no one is looking out their window. No one EVER even looks over. I just don't get it. It's the adults, not the kids. The kids are fantastic, and friendly and wonderful friends of our own kids.

One small breakthrough that we had was a couple months ago when we got home from being out with the family. I saw some kids sitting on one of the complex porches, so I went over there with Caleb and Johnny. There were about 6 kids, and when we went over we found out there was a birthday party. One of the adults came out and offered cake to the boys, at which they accepted excitedly. We sat on the porch with the kids, while they played with my hair and Johnny's hair with such fascination. Jon came over at one point, and one of the guys came out of the apartment. They talked for a few minutes, but it turned out that this guy didn't live at the complex - he was an uncle just there for the party. So, still nothing from our neighbors. No one else came out that day, and to this day, nearly 7 months since our move in date, not one person has even glanced over as they drove by. What can we do about this?

Last night after dinner, all five of us were outside playing, as we like to do every night before bed. The boys' friends Jameer and LaRon came over to play, and Jameer's cousin Jo, whom we had met one other time came too. Jo, who is 12, came right over and hugged me as if we were old friends - it was sweet. The boys all played catch with Jon (which was one of the cutest things ever), and Jo showed me some of her cheerleading and dance moves, and told me about school. I was so sad, because it was as if no one ever watched her, or got excited for her, or cared to listen to her. I took a few pictures of them all and Jammer acted like the kids in Kenya and Uganda did - as if no one had ever taken this child's picture before. How do we reach these neighbors through this barrier of culture, or stereotypes, or assumptions? I guess for now, we show these kids love - we show them how a mommy and a daddy can love each other and their kids. Maybe these kids aren't seeing that at home, and we are their example for their futures. Maybe I'm making assumptions...

Thoughts?