Playing Catch-Up...or Something

I have literally not looked at my blog (or really anyone else's, for that matter) in nearly 4 months...mostly I'm sorry to myself for that - and Sam. Why have i been avoiding it? Well, I pretty much reached my weight goals (although I'm up about 5 pounds from where I want to be, but it's not from a lack of knowing what to do and how to do it, just from slacking), and I just didn't want to blog about that boring stuff anymore. And lately, I have had SO MUCH on my mind that I haven't even known where to begin when it comes to playing catch-up with blogging. So, maybe I won't even try...

But where should I begin? Maybe I will just list some thoughts I've been having, and then at some point in later blogs I will expand on some of the details on some of my thoughts. Yeah...that's what I'll do.

So, lately I've been struggling with:

* my feelings that perhaps the church as a whole (and I am generalizing here) is REALLY missing it. This is a horrendously sick and dying world - physically and spiritually - and it seems we've convinced ourselves that showing up and doing all the right, cool things on Sundays is what it means to live a life worthy of the calling of Christ...

* my feelings of judgment towards the judgmental. Does that make sense? So many Christians put so much emphasis on the DON'Ts in life (are we even certain that they are "don'ts"?) that we forget about the command to LOVE. I struggle not to get angry with that.

* waiting on God. He has caused my heart to really beat for those in developing nations, but I struggle not knowing WHEN or even IF He will send us to them, and if He is, then by what means will He use? I've allowed this to be a factor of UNmotivation for me in present day living - with my home, and my kids, and my husband and serving right here and now.

* a lack of feeling as though I'm stepping out on faith to do anything. I was encouraged in our Uganda meeting on Sunday to hear one team member talk about how this trip is THE GREATEST leap of faith that he has ever taken. I crave that leap, and that need and that dependence. What am I missing? What am I not doing? Am I stagnant?

* wondering if this trip to Uganda that Jon and I are leading is a God-driven and led trip, or something that I just decided to plan to get me to Africa sooner than God is intending. Wow, that's scary for me to say out loud...

Maybe that's it for now. If I have one or two readers left out there, don't hesitate to comment or ask questions.

Ahhhh...I must say, it feels good to be back!

Weigh-In #??

While I HAVE been keeping track of what I eat, how much water I drink and the exercising I do, I have NOT been keeping track of weeks or weigh-in numbers. So, today was weigh in # who knows. But...who cares, cause the outcome is GREAT! I started back in April weighing in at 152. Then I did the Master Cleanse, but gained most of that 9 pounds back. I started this particular weight loss journey - the sustainable, habit changing, healthier living journey - at 149. My goal weight is 130, which will be 22 pounds when all is said and done. (I know, I'm AWESOME at math!) Today when I got on the scale it read 133.4! WOW! I was really hoping to be at 135 by Lily's birthday which is on the 22nd...but ideally I wanted to be at my goal - and now I am seeing that it just might be possible! Last week I was 136.8, so it seems if I really stick with it for these next couple of weeks, that I'll be there!

I really wish I had taken actual BEFORE pictures, because the difference I see and feel is amazing - to me, at least. I'd really like to be able to compare it with an AFTER picture in a couple weeks. But, I shouldn't complain because I'm nearly there, picture or no picture! HOORAY!

Keep Your Head Up!

Sounds worse than it is... I'm not hanging my head out of shame or failure or anything of the kind. I'm simply reminding myself that with all the 5:45am walks and runs I'm venturing out on, I need to keep my head up so I don't miss all those early morning creatures!

It's been quite awhile since I've posted...I'VE BEEN BUSY, and still am, actually. I'm having a yard sale this Friday and Saturday, VBS in our neighborhood starting the 19th and I'm the music leader (motions and all, people!), PLUS we're moving into our new house on the 31st and there's TONS to do (of which Jon is doing 99% of it...I've just done some painting)! So, there's a lot going on, but I'm happy to say that WEIGHT LOSS IS one of the things happening.

I FINALLY fell off my plateau of 141.8 pounds, and I can see and feel a significant difference! Trying clothes on in the dressing rooms used to be HORRIBLY depressing, as I would bring in things that I thought would fit, but NOPE, they sure didn't cause my sweet love-handles and gut would be protruding from all sides - UGH! Now I can bring skinny-person shirts into the dressing room and actually be excited about the way they fit! HOORAY!! Feels good!

None of this has anything to do with my blog title. What I was going to talk about were all the cute little animals I see in the mornings when I go out. I'm up super early so the raccoons, groundhogs, rabbits and birds don't know to expect anyone. I've had a few face-offs with the local raccoon family...I can't tell who's more intimidated by our closeness - me or the raccoon. But we've been close! Then there's the cute little bunnies. Oh, but that poor, poor beautiful blue jay I hit with my car yesterday on my way to go walking with my dad. It was a sad moment. Anyway, I do like to keep my head up so I can see this morning beauty that all the happily sleeping people (of whom I am slightly jealous) are missing.

HOWEVER, if I kept my head up all the time I would have missed my scale reading 136.8 this past Thursday...GETTING CLOSE to my goal! I'm going to weigh in again this Thursday in hopes for another loss. 6.8 pounds until the end! Wonder if I can make it by Lily's 1st birthday on the 22nd?? Maybe that's pushing it...

Still at it...

It's been a little while since I've updated. Mostly because I don't have anything exciting to write about, but I guess that's not exactly the point of this journey. It's more about the accountability - letting the world (or all 3 of you readers) know what I'm up to and showing you all the dirty numbers on the scale!

So the update is this: I'm definitely still at this whole getting in shape thing. I've been faithful with my weekly exercise routines, and am doing well with protein intake versus sugar and fat intake for the most part. I feel a LOT better when I am clothed and look in the mirror. I see a significant difference no matter what the scale says, which is what's the most important I think.

Two major feel good moments: 1. on Monday I weighed in UNDER 140 for the first time in a LONG time - hooray!! I was 139.8...I'll take it! 2. I tried on my 2 bathing suits that I own (one of which I figured out I've had for 9 years), and I actually didn't hate it. Now that's progress!!

So maybe I did have exciting things to write about after all! I have less than 10 pounds to go now (9.8 to be exact) until I reach my goal weight. I hear that the last few pounds are the hardest to lose. Sounds awesome. I guess I'll just keep at it and get there eventually!!

BTW - Jon and I bought our first house - HOORAY!!!! :) (and this is the just-home-from-the-closing picture...)

For some reason I've been losing a little of my motivation to really be eating healthy. When I'm out or at a friend's house I feel like I'm just throwing it all down the drain and eating what everyone else is having, regardless of how bad it is for me. I am wondering if it's partially due to the fact that my healthy and yummy breakfast foods are gone. I'd been having 3 egg whites with salsa (actually REALLY yummy!) and/or some organic vanilla yogurt with granola. With those things not being in the house, I feel like my day isn't jump started with healthy eating like it had been. Instead I've been having either whole wheat toast with Simply Jif peanut butter or some Multi-Grain Cheerios...both of which are pretty good, but not my usual start to the day that's been exciting to me. Hmmm... Maybe I should just get out and actually go shopping and see if helps to have that food around.

This week has been really good for my work-out plan. I've done 2 days of interval training on the treadmill, which I love....after it's all over. It's TOUGH, though! It's going back and forth between a quick walk to all different speeds of jogging and running - all the way to 10mph - kill me now! I sweat like a nasty beast when it's done! But, I know I've worked hard, at least! I've done 2 days of lifting, which has been really cool. I'm supposed to be focusing on doing the exercise correctly and breathing the right way - amazing the difference those things make! It doesn't take much to really feel my muscles working! I also did 1 day of just walking...3 miles wit friends at a walking trail plus another 2 miles on the treadmill. I enjoy a good long walk!

I just don't know if I'm going to make it down to my goal weight. I feel stuck right around this 140 spot...feel like I've been stuck here for years! Just need to stick with it, I guess...and wait until I reach my goal to allow myself to plateau. Hmph - I'm a big whiner, huh?! :)

Wed. Weigh-In...A Wasted Week!

Well, yesterday was weigh-in number 3, and while it wasn't as bad as I thought it might be, I wasn't happy with the results. I gained .4 pounds - almost a half a pound, and was 141.6. Not surprising after my weekend away...details on that weekend are in the previous post if anyone cares. I was SUUUUPER excited to get into the 130's, so I was bummed feeling like I'd wasted a whole week. Now I have to keep trying and see if I can get there by next Wednesday.

I have started my lifting and interval training routine, which has been great! The lifting seems a little easy, so I may need to find out about tweaking that a bit. But 20 minutes of interval training between 4mph and 10mph on the treadmill kicked my BUTT - and it felt SO good afterward! I'm really looking forward to keeping this up and seeing the results.

One of the motivating factors for me in all this is helping to inspire others to get up and go, too. My sister-in-law has been out regularly walking and I am SO proud of her for getting out there and doing it! Also, I was super mean to my friend last night and MADE her get off her butt and exercise - haha! She protested, but felt so good in the end that she'd done it. I'm really proud of you guys!! :) So, let's stay in this together, shall we? :)

A (GREAT) So-So Weekend & the "Plan"

The weekend away had it's good points and it's bad points - as far as the eating and exercising goes...the time away was ALL good! It was refreshing, relaxing and so much fun to catch up with friends and spend some much needed time with just adults! Back to the eating... The first afternoon and night I spent with some friends who have been following my little journey towards reclaiming my body, so Erin (my friend) greeted me with a 4 mile walk, and a healthy dinner that night. It was great! I skipped breakfast the following morning (I know, not smart, right?) because I knew I would be eating out for the rest of the weekend. Some choices were better than others, and I didn't get any more exercise in (besides walking through the shops and streets).

So, today is a new day, and I am READY to get back on track....not that there is really a track - which is actually what I really love about my change this time around, is that it's not about diets or rules, it's just about lifestyle changes. In the past when I have cut something out of my diet, like desserts for example, that's ALL I can think about. I crave it. I yearn for it. I NEED it. But this time, I am allowing myself whatever, whenever. In general, I am just trying to make smarter choices, and I'm happy with the results so far. I feel better, I am starting to look better, and I'm realizing that I can do it! Cheesy, ain't it?! ;)

Today I am starting my little exercise "plan" that our friend John gave me. It fits my schedule and is all very doable! It has variety, and I'm not going to be forcing myself to try and do things I don't like...I always wished that I loved running long distances, but I just don't! So anyway, this routine works best for my body to help meet my goals.

Here's the layout of my week:

Monday and Thursday: Lifting (5 specific exercises) and 20 minutes of whatever on the treadmill, but only if I WANT - sweet, huh?!
Tuesday and Friday: 20 minute interval training on the treadmill
Wednesday: 45-60 minutes of walking or jogging or whatever I want on the treadmill

That's it, really. I'd like to try and maybe get out to the walking trail on Saturdays with the family, but that ends up being more of a stroll than a work-out sometimes. But, what's more important than spending time with the family, so WHO CARES! :)

Well, the kiddos are asleep so I'd better hop to it!

Weigh-In #2

Well, my weekend of good choices seems to have paid off, and that's a great feeling!! Here are the numbers:

* Original weigh-in: 149.4
* Weigh-in #1: 146
* Today's weigh-in: 141.2
* This week's weight-loss: 4.8 lbs.
* Total weight-loss: 8.2 lbs.

I'm really hoping that by this time next week I will be in the 130's. I haven't been below 140 since we were in Kenya 3 years ago. Before that it hasn't been since before I became pregnant with Caleb. So, I am SUUUUUPER excited to make the 130's my actual weight! But...I'm not there yet, so I need to slooooow down! I'm just so excited! I am going away this weekend, and will be eating out for a number of meals. But, I KNOW I can do well this weekend just like this past weekend, and I am looking forward to seeing positive results come from making good choices!

Beans, Beans, the Musical Fruit...

I was emailed this super yummy recipe from Spark People (a "diet" website I was VERY briefly a part of right before I found out I was pregnant with Lily) for "Black Bean Hummus", and since we have an overabundance of black beans in our "Austin Convenience Store" (thank you, WIC) I decided to make some. It's 2 cans of black beans, 1/2 an onion, 1/2 green pepper, some garlic and ground cumin all blended up with some salsa. Yummy. Healthy. Delicious on a whole wheat wrap or as a chip dip. Yesterday I had my one serving (1/2 cup) of this dip along with one serving of (organic) tortilla chips (9 chips), and enjoyed every bite! Shortly after was time for me to serve the kids lunch. We had some leftover chili in the fridge (thank you Cheri), so I divvied it up for the kids and saw that there was a perfect (and healthy!) serving size left for me. So, that was lunch. I wondered how my stomach would do with so many beans, but the day went on just fine...UNTIL I hopped on the treadmill in the evening. After about 3/4 of a mile my stomach started to rumble. After exactly 1.082 miles I had to jump off the treadmill and run to the bathroom, which is where I spent the remainder of the evening...UGH!! It felt like the first morning of The Master Cleanse all over again (except this time it wasn't self-induced with a laxative)!

So, tomorrow is weigh-in #2. I definitely feel and see a difference this week, but I'm wondering if Aunt Flo will have some negative influence on the actual weigh-in. I know it's more how I FEEL than what the numbers say, so either way...

Off to have a healthy (non-bean-related) snack!!

Restaurants and Holidays Don't Have to End it All!

The advice that some of you gave about eating out and being with other people was great. I think I am just so excited about all this and finally just feel READY to make changes in my lifestyle, that I have found eating at restaurants and being with friends not too tough. This weekend posed many challenges, and I believe I did pretty well. We went to stay with some friends this weekend, and the first thing we did was go out to Chili's to eat together. I was impressed with the choices of lower fat items, but NOT impressed that the things that were marked as healthy were those items that contain less than 750 calories and 25 grams of fat - that's the healthy stuff? Seriously? It's made me realize how HORRIBLY I normally would have eaten when I go there...endless chips and salsa, plus maybe some skillet queso (delish!), and a yummy meal that most definitely would NOT fall under the "healthy" choices. Plus, the molten lava cake is one of my favorite desserts ever so on a normal day I may hve splurged and gotten that or shared with Jon. But, I was impressed how yummy and satisfied I was with grilled chicken topped with pico de gallo, black beans, and steamed broccoli. I even took some home (ok, technically I left it at John and Leah's but that was my plan anyway)! I did enjoy one fried cheese stick, and about 3 chips with salsa. But, honestly, I have zero complaints!

The next day Jon and I went to see my dad graduate from Malone University with yet another Master's Degree - we are SO proud of his accomplishment! Of course, we went out to eat afterward to celebrate. My dad's choice was Texas Roadhouse, and it was a great place! My dad's been raving about their bread, so I did have one roll to start, but again I was able to easily make decent choices (on my own this time, as they did not have anything marked as healthier choices) and didn't feel like I over ate.

Oh, Happy Mother's Day, by the way! I have an amazing little family who made me cards and promises for a wonderful day and week to come. Jon even made me breakfast in bed, but made me healthy foods since he knows that's what I'm wanting these days. Isn't he just wonderful (I know, I talked all about it last time...)?! He made me a 3 egg white omelet with one slice of cheese (that was an unusual splurge), plus a small dish of organic, low-fat strawberry yogurt mixed with granola and dried fruit - YUMSTER! He's just so thoughtful! For lunch he made me a salad topped with my leftover grilled chicken from the roadhouse.

So, while the focus of our weekend was of course not about food, I felt like it has been a super fun weekend without any regrets of what I ate. That always feels good, doesn't it? I'm super excited about what's ahead. Our friend John has a degree in Exercise Science (I think that's what it's called), and he has a whole simple-to-do-at-home program he's setting up just for me that will get me the results I'm looking for in the most effective way. So...more on that later!!

Off to enjoy the rest of a very restful Mother's Day...

Weigh-In #1 and a Splurge!

So far, so good. Yesterday was my first official weigh-in. and I was down 3.4 pounds for the first week. While naturally I would like to be down 10 pounds already, I suppose I am happy with 3.4. "They" say that 1-2 pounds lost per week is great, so I have a 1.4 pound bonus, I guess. Maybe as an American I am just so used to instant gratification - everything at my fingertips right when I want it. Maybe that's why, since I feel so excited about losing weight and eating healthy and exercising, that I want to just be done at the end of week 1. I suppose, though, that if that were the case, I would easily slip back into the old fashioned way of eating and not really exercising. If it takes 6 weeks or so, by that point I should have established new habits and it will just be "life" by then...with no weight gains once the goal is reached. Who knows. Either way, 3.4 pounds isn't bad.

I allowed myself some SUUUUper yummy ice cream last night. We went over to a friends house who was saving this half gallon of ice cream for when we came over. They'd gotten it in Columbus and brought it back in a cooler. It was well worth the wait, and well worth the splurge. That was some AMAZING ice cream! Tonight I am getting together with some friends and I'm sure there will be some not-so-healthy choices of delicious food. What to do, what to do?? I suppose I should go in with a plan. But what that plan will be, I don't yet know. Any suggestions??

I Love Jon - and Hair Elastics

Why is it that I have such a difficult time believing Jon when he tells me I look good or that I am beautiful? I'm sure if he didn't mean it, he just wouldn't say anything, but since he's offering up the compliment on his own, I should just believe him. But still I doubt. How could he possibly - that's what I always wonder. Whether I choose to believe him or not (which I do try really hard to, although I have trouble accepting compliments as it is) I am married to an AMAZING, loving and supportive man. Awwww...isn't that sweet? For real, though. When I see so many relationships around me falling apart or under tons of strain, I thank God for giving me the perfect match for me. Not that there is never any strain, but in the big picture, I am BLESSED with having Jon in my life.

That's not even what I was thinking I was going to write about - it just came out. So, there's a shout out to Jon Austin for you all!! (For some more good stuff about Jon Austin, check him out here! ;))

I've been feeling good - good about eating well and being excited to eat well, and good about getting my exercise in regularly. While my apple shape is still tough to accept, I am at least happy to see a little bit of that clavicle returning...I love that bone! One thing I am looking forward to is being able to try on clothes in a dressing room and not want to throw up every time I put a different shirt onm or take the shirt off again, for that matter. Plus, what the heck, why is it that my booty and legs can look decent in a pair of jeans, but only jeans that I need an extra 4 inches around the waist...argh! And I REFUSE to wear maternity jeans...I didn't even do that when I was pregnant. Hair elastics work wonders - highly recommend those puppies!! ;)

I'm looking forward to Wednesday morning so I can see if I have lost a couple of pounds. I'll admit, I did an unofficial weigh-in this morning (go ahead and verbally spank me...I said it was UNofficial, ok?!), but since it was unofficial, I won't even mention any results.

In other news... I think Lily might be a baby genius (all parents know that about their children, obviously). She's almost 9 1/2 months now, and she has been saying "hi" for awhile. But, I swear, she tries to copy nearly everything we say. Jon heard her say "all done" tonight, which I was happy about because he was starting to think I was making stuff up each time I told Jon she was saying that. She has also copied "bottle", "up", "Daddy", "Momma" and even "necklace". She waves hi and na-night. Seriously, someone call the press - I have given birth to (an un-insane version of) Einstein!


BTW - keep up the voting at the top of the page, all you new readers. So far I am not at all surprised by the results!

It Is Time!!

I wonder how long I can go on convincing myself that my extra baby baggage will just fall off my body on it's own, or that I will one day just get used to being unhappy when I look in the mirror - especially when I have nothing on! (Sorry to give an image to you wonderful readers!) A major part of my struggle with even talking about this is that I know when I'm parked next to some I look like I definitely need to shed some weight, and when I'm parked next to others I look nice and thin. I think regardless of who's around, it's about feeling good about yourself, and I believe that people of all shapes (I think I'm an apple shape) and sizes struggle with their self-image. Am I right? I don't know...(take the above poll so we can all see a little bit of what truth might be behind that.)

Anyway, for me it is time. It is time to take control of one of the very few things in life that we have control of. What I eat and how active I am. I am an athlete by nature, I think. I spent hours upon hours upon hours in the gym in high school and college practicing and playing volleyball - games, double sessions in pre-season, track or basketball between seasons, in the weight room in the summers, and the list goes on. No wonder I could eat whatever I wanted without noticing much change. (It's funny, though, that even then I wished I was smaller, or more comfortable in my own skin.) Then I graduated, got married, got pregnant pretty quick, and this once athletic body became nothing more than an incubator for four children. Now don't get me wrong, I do not for a single second regret having my kids...I worked hard for this body I have now!! And I will never tell my kids that it's their fault for the way I look or feel about myself. It's not. I have played on some club teams here and their, and was active in Kenya just from living life there (and was, in fact, at my ideal body weight when I lived there...lack of preservatives and crap food maybe??)

So, I started last week just being more conscious of what I'm eating and making sure I get on my treadmill on a regular basis. I really feel motivated this time, and I am looking forward to seeing some results. Here is what I am already doing:

* Being aware of what I am eating at meals.
* Waiting until I am hungry to eat.
* Making better choices about foods - healthier, no high fructose corn syrup, fruits and veggies, etc.
* Getting on the treadmill as many days as I have time for.
* Trying to drink 8 - 8oz. glasses of water each day.

I want to continue all of these things, along with weighing myself once a week (on Wednesday mornings), and keep track of my progress on here - kind of like a journal and kind of like an accountability partner...with ALL (2?) of you readers.

Starting weight (as of last Wednesday): 149.4
Goal weight: 130

And it's not just about weight. I want to FEEL good again. I want to be an athlete again...or at least be able to run on the treadmill for an extended period of time, or have tone arms and legs again. (I remember there was a day when I couldn't pinch fat under my arms...those days are long gone, but I wouldn't mind reclaiming them!)

So journey with me if you will...and if you're not hearing from me, let me know!! I need YOU to help keep me accountable! (But it's nice knowing this is a CHOICE that I have the POWER to make - and now is the time to make it!)

The Master Cleanse

So, I am beginning The Master Cleanse tomorrow morning (well, technically tonight, I guess since the first laxative is taken the night before). I know a couple of friends have done this process of cleaning out the toxins in your body...anyone have any thoughts, suggestions, comments??? I will keep an update on how I am feeling - physically, emotionally...and with weight loss, too! Here's hoping the next 10 days are fast and that this process really works! :)

Leading By Example - Going, Serving, Loving, Giving

Setting the scene: Caleb had one stuffed cat, and Hannah had another.
Johnny: Caleb, can I have that cat? I want to play with it.
Caleb: Well, Hannah has a cat, too. Maybe you can have hers. Hannah, will you let Johnny play with that cat now?
Hannah: NO!
Caleb: Please, Hannah? It would be really nice of you to share.
Hannah: NO!
Caleb: But Hannah, God really wants us to be nice to other people and to share what we have with them. Isn't that right, Mommy?
Me: I think that's exactly what God wants.
Caleb: That's what I'm trying to teach Hannah by having her give her cat to Johnny.
Me: Well, I think a better way of teaching Hannah how to share and to give to others is by showing her how to do that and giving Johnny YOUR cat.
Caleb: Hmmm....

This little interaction between myself and the kids was really precious to me. I loved that Caleb has the mindset of helping others, but it's cute to see his still-very-much five year old mind battling what he knows is right. But, I began to wonder, perhaps it's true that we all sort of have that still-very-much five year old mind. At that age, the world is all about them. But, honestly, does that ever really stop being what the world is about? Doesn't the world tell us to always go for bigger and better and more? Me, me, me...it's all about me.

I love the idea of the upside down Kingdom - that life just isn't about me. My money isn't my money, and my kids aren't even my kids. It's all my Father's and he has been gracious enough to lend me these things, so I can use them - in partnership with him - for His glory and His work.

I have to evaluate my life often, in terms of this conversation with Caleb. It's easy for me to say exactly what I think God wants of me, but am I really doing it, or just expecting others around me to do it? Am I really putting into action the characteristics of the Christ-follower that I am trying to be? Am I loving? Am I giving? Am I serving?

Just as I hope Caleb will learn to lead by example, I need to do the same. How can I expect my children to know how to serve and give and love our neighbors if I'm not doing it?

Thanks, Caleb, for reminding me of my call to action - my call to go, and serve and love and give. To be the hands and feet of Christ in this world...

Butterflies and Cars

She loves stuffed animals, cars, butterflies and trucks. She says, "poo-poo" and gives the sweetest hugs and kisses (not at the same time). She cuddles and adores her baby sister, and wrestles with her brothers. She plays with trucks, baby dolls, strollers and lions. She reads books about Spiderman, cranky bears, shapes and animals. She dives off couches and climbs "mountains" with her brothers. She watches Dora, The Wiggles, Barney...well, anything, really. She is beautiful, smart, hilarious, fun and oh-SO-much more! She is my baby girl, and she is TWO today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY SWEET AND SILLY HANNAH! I LOVE YOU WAY, WAY, WAY MORE THAN I COULD EVER PUT INTO WORDS!!

The Itch

No. I don't have some weird and creepy disease...sorry, no good gossip to be found here! I'm talking about this itch that I get every year to year and a half to get out of this country.

As many of you know, Lily and I had the incredible privilege of taking a 9 day trip to Scotland last month. (And if you were wondering why you missed out on this news, I kept it off of Facebook...reasons to be mentioned further down.) It makes me sad to know that Jon's entire family lives over there, and that there was a grandchild/niece/cousin that they hadn't met yet. So, we made the decision to go. The best part about it (and the reason I didn't mention it on FB) was that Jon's mom had no idea (well, maybe a small suspicion a while back) that we were coming. When Lily and I showed up to her birthday girls brunch, Jane (Jon's mom, and Lily's middle-namesake) was nearly shaking and got the goosebumps - I think she was excited to meet her newest grandchild!
We had an AMAZING time - truly.

Here are some thoughts on my time away:

~ Airplane restrooms have always seemed small to me, but never as small as on my flight to Amsterdam. I had to bring Lily in with me, fold down the "changing table", attempt to fit my head between the under-side of that table and the toilet and the proceed to vomit. It was quite a site! (I was anxious about flying alone with a baby...I'd gotten myself pretty worked up about it!)

~ Lily is absolutely the most perfect traveling baby to ever exist. She sucked her thumb and fell asleep on my shoulder on every flight. In all of the 30+ hours of travel time, she whimpered maybe twice for about 10 seconds. Amazing.

~ Amsterdam airport is a place I could sit all day long and people watch. It is a true melting-pot of so many of the cultures in our world. People are so beautiful - their clothing and hair and style; their language and expressions and attempts to communicate in a foreign country is magnificent to watch and listen to. I love it.

~ Scotland is incredibly gorgeous - even in the dead of winter. It is so green and hilly. There are still sheep roaming the hillsides. The old castle ruins, and castles still standing are breathtaking under their thin layer of fresh snow. The weather is mild and time at the coast still feels like vacation. And the sunsets...OH the sunsets! What a place!

~ The similarities between Jon and his parents are hysterical...down to Jon's dad hating to wash the silverware - just like Jon. And both Geoff and Jane searching frantically for keys, wallets and phone minutes after they should be out the door. (I say all this out of love, of course, Geoff and Jane!;))


~ No matter how many times I go to Britain, double-decker buses (even the school buses were...) and old-fashioned telephone booths will always be things I get excited to see. (Thanks Jaime and Jo for indulging my American tourist needs!)

~ As much as I would have loved having the rest of my family with me, it was great being there without Jon. Sounds bad, but what I mean is that every other time I've been there with Jon, as his wife...visiting because he wanted to see his family. (That's not actually true, but I can see how it could be perceived that way.) This time, I was able to be Angela...not Jon's wife...in Scotland visiting Jon's family because I chose to - because I wanted to. It was awesome to build relationships with Jon's family without him being there. I had a BLAST!!

"Confessions" of an Almost 29-Year-Old

I don't like talking about myself - it makes me really uncomfortable. But, I was thinking of little tid-bits about who I am, and thought I would follow in the footsteps of my sister-in-law Betsy and write some "confessions". So, for no particular reason, here they are:

1. I really wish I was more motivated - to eat healthier, to exercise regularly, to be super hands-on with my kids, to play in the snow, to keep an amazingly clean house.

2. I really like the movie K-Pax. I may be the only one I know of who does.

3. I don't shower nearly as often as I probably should.

4. I hate it when I go to the restroom in a public place, and when I come out I have to look around like a big idiot for the person I'm with. I give Jon a place to stand and he knows he has to stay there, or I stress!

5. I would move to Africa tomorrow if I could (with my family, of course).

6. Caleb told me yesterday that my stomach looks stripey, little, and a little bit big.

7. Me and my brothers have matching scars on our stomachs from pyloric stenosis when we were babies. If I ever had "work done" on my stomach, I wouldn't let anyone touch that scar, cause I really like that we match.

8. Something that bugs me more than anythings else is someone who presents themselves as being "awesome" or better than everyone else...or someone that thinks they have all the answers. Grrrr.

9. The thought of chewing on a sock is like nails on a chalkboard to me. Why would anyone chew on a sock? I don't know, but let's just stop talking about it...it's giving me the heebie-jeebies.

10. Big Red gum gives me painful little bumps on my tongue that last forever. Other than that I really like Big Red - but I won't chew it anymore.

11. Someday I want to deliver babies in Africa. There's nothing in the world quite like child birth, and so many women there have no one to help them through it.

12. I have a really horrible memory. It's pretty frustrating, but maybe once I'm old enough I'll actually just forget that I have a bad memory and it won't frustrate me anymore.

13. My brother Dave and I both have numb areas on the left side of our backs. (Don't be concerned...our doctors have both found nothing to worry about.)

14. I'm really good at burping really loud. I hold it in most of the time - especially when the British side of my family is around! ;)

15. There are VERY few things in my life that I am proud of myself for, but one thing is giving birth to Johnny without any pain medication. Now, I know it's different for everyone, and some people can do that without much trouble, but it was HELL going through it for me, but I did it, and that makes me proud of myself. :)